The Rancher's Christmas Bride Page 8

Alex rubbed a hand over his face. Cash. Something he didn’t have a lot of.

  “I appreciate your advice, Blake.” Alex stood and reached for the other man’s hand.

  “Alex, I’m here to help. I’ve watched you grow up a lot in the past ten years. You’ve done well for yourself, and you’ve thought about your future. I know you’re going to make the right decision and get through this. Here’s a loan packet. Fill this out. Get me the documents I’ve listed in there.”

  Alex took the envelope and left. It was a warm day and the sun beat down on him as he crossed the parking lot to his truck. A truck parked next to his looked familiar. He pushed his hat back to get a better look and then he shook his head.

  “Marcus,” he said as he walked up to the passenger-side door.

  “Alex,” Marcus whispered, his voice hoarse.

  “How’d you know where to find me?”

  “Lucy told me.” He shook his head. “I can’t believe Mom did this.”

  “I’m not sure why we’re surprised.”

  “I don’t think I want the ranch,” Marcus said. “Or anything to do with it.”

  Alex shouldn’t have been surprised. Marcus had been running since he turned eighteen. Even when he was in town he stayed with a friend on the opposite side of Bluebonnet Springs. But Alex hadn’t thought Marcus would turn his back on them. Or on the ranch.

  “I can’t do this on my own.”

  “Lucy will help,” Marcus whispered.

  “It’s our home.”

  “It’s your home,” Marcus countered.

  Alex pulled off his hat and swiped his arm across his brow. “Where are you headed?”

  “I’m on my way to Kansas. But if you want to go to Killeen, I’ll buy you lunch.”

  “Sure, why not.” He placed his hat back on his head. “I’m picking the restaurant.”

  One side of his twin’s mouth kicked up. “Sure.”

  Alex headed for his truck. As glad as he was to see his twin, he couldn’t help but feel like things were going from bad to worse.

  On the drive to Killeen he had a talk with himself and the good Lord. Because he had to believe that this would work out. He had to believe that God had a plan.

  He decided to call his sister. It was new, this relationship where he turned to Lucy. He’d avoided her for a long time after that night his dad had locked her in the barn. He’d felt as if he let her down and he hadn’t been able to look her in the eyes for a long, long time.

  He put his phone on speaker and placed it on the console. “Marcus isn’t interested in helping.”

  “I talked to him earlier. I told him to cowboy up and tell you to your face. Did he?”

  “Yeah, he did.”

  “We’ll do this, Alex. Don’t let it get to you. You can’t force Marcus to choose the path you’re choosing.”

  “I know. I still kind of feel gut-stomped.”

  “I know. This whole thing has been a bit of a shock. We’ll figure something out. I promise.”

  “Right. So I guess Mom isn’t coming to Christmas dinner.”

  Lucy laughed a little at his poor attempt at a joke. “No. I guess she isn’t. I saw Dan in town. I guess you busted him out of the hospital yesterday.”

  “Yeah, we did.” No. He and Marissa weren’t a we. Or a they. Yesterday Dan had told her she could stay a few more days.

  And then she’d be gone. Back to Dallas. Back to her life. She would be a kindergarten teacher. She’d meet a subdivision kind of guy who drove a big sedan. Or maybe one of those electric cars that had to be plugged in.

  “Alex?”

  “Sorry. Just thinking.” He cleared his throat. “I’ll sell the bulls.”

  “What?”

  “The bulls. I invested a lot in them, and I can use that money to pay off the second mortgage. That’ll buy me time to get a loan to buy out our mother. I’m afraid if we don’t, she’ll do something else to get us further into debt.”

  “Calm down. Don’t rush into anything.”

  “I guess we don’t have time to sit on our hands.” He approached a steak house. “I’ve got to go. Marcus is buying me lunch.”

  She hung up and he made the turn into the parking lot of the restaurant. His brain had taken a serious left turn and was stuck on Marissa. He’d never been the person who saw himself as part of a couple. He’d never relied on anyone other than his siblings.

  That’s why it didn’t make sense that he didn’t want to be at this restaurant with his twin. He wanted to be in Bluebonnet Springs sitting at the tiny table in Dan’s camper, having a cup of coffee with Marissa. As much as he wanted to be with her, he had to be the last thing she needed or wanted in her life.

  * * *

  Marissa held tight to the kitten she’d found in the barn. It didn’t really seem to want to be held. She deduced that from the way it was clawing and biting at her gloved hands. But she wouldn’t let go. The other grown cat she’d seen stalking a mouse the previous day had cornered the kitten in the feed room and Marissa had been positive the cat meant to tear the kitten to pieces.

  Using her teeth, she pulled the glove off her left hand and held the kitten tight with her right hand. She opened the door of the camper and stepped inside. Her grandfather looked up from his recliner, his eyes narrowing in on the gray kitten. He’d been home for a day, but already he was telling her to go on back to Dallas. She’d told him she needed to be here to help him. And besides, she was getting pretty good at driving a tractor and she finally knew the difference between a cow and a bull.

  “No,” he said as he pointed to the front door. “Barn cats stay in the barn.”

  He’d been acting what Alex called “cantankerous” since they brought him home. He’d complained about the wreath she’d put on the front door. He’d told her he wasn’t going to let her put up any kind of Christmas tree. There wasn’t room for one, he insisted. And he was probably right, but she couldn’t imagine not having a tree. Even if she wasn’t staying, she wanted him to have one.

  “The old tomcat was after him,” she explained. She took the kitten to the kitchen and poured it a small bowl of milk.

  “I don’t care if he was using that kitten to bait a mousetrap. It goes back to the barn.”

  She gave him a warning look. “You’ll have yourself coughing if you don’t stop.”

  “Bah.” He waved a dismissive hand. “You’ll have me coughing if you don’t stop testing my patience.”

  “I’m not sure what you mean. I hadn’t noticed you have any patience.”

  He pushed himself up out of the chair and headed for the kitchen, a frown firmly in place, but she’d seen the hint of a grin. “I don’t. And that’s why your grandmother left me. I was a drunk with a short fuse.”

  The revelation shocked her.

  He poured himself a glass of juice. “And you remind me of her. You don’t have any quit in you.”

  She smiled at the compliment. Even if he hadn’t meant for it to be one. “I couldn’t find that cow you told me to look for.”

  He set down his glass on the counter. “Well, maybe you should have said that the minute you walked through the door instead of worrying about that kitten.”

  “I’m sorry. I’ll go back out and look again. I just wanted to get a heavier coat.”

  “I’ll go.” He was already heading for the tiny closet by the front door.

  “No, Granddad. You have to stay inside.”

  “I have to find that cow. You don’t understand her value. And the value of her calf. I can’t afford to leave them out there to die.”

  “Granddad, Alex said you have cattle disappearing. We noticed four-wheeler tracks. And the IRS called. I’m worried about you.”

  “It isn’t any of your dad-burned business.”

&nbs
p; “It is my business. You’re my grandfather.”

  He pointed a shaking finger at her. “You didn’t seem to care about that until your groom walked out on you.”

  “I would have cared had I known. And stop trying to badger me. This is serious. We need to call the police.”

  “Don’t you dare call the police. I’ll take care of this. Once I get the IRS paid off, they’ll go back to bothering other taxpayers.”

  Except she wasn’t convinced it was the IRS. How did she tell him she thought he was being duped?

  “I have to go get that cow.” He pulled open the door of the tiny closet.

  “I’ll go get Alex,” she said quickly, before he could head out the front door. As much as she didn’t want to lean on their neighbor so much, he was really the only person she knew to go to for help.

  “Alex has his own set of troubles.” He gave her a pointed look. “And don’t be thinking that’s the direction you need to be turning. I know how you young people are. You get hurt and you immediately rebound to whoever you can find. Alex is the last person a girl like you needs to take up with.”

  “I’m not looking for a rebound relationship,” she informed him as she watched the kitten lap up the milk. “I’m trying to help you, and Alex seems to have the same goal. And he’s really the only person I know in town, so I thought I would go get him.”

  “Uh-huh,” he said. “I know what it’s like, you city gals and the lure of a cowboy. I wasn’t always this old.”

  “I’m not interested in a cowboy. I’m not interested in anyone. A little under a week ago I thought I was getting married and he walked out on me. There is no instant rebound from that.”

  The expression on his face softened. He hung his jacket back in the closet and returned to the juice he’d left on the counter.

  “No, I reckon there isn’t an easy rebound from that. And I’m sorry. Sorry as anything that you thought you had to come here to me and not to your parents, or whatever friends you have in Dallas. It doesn’t seem natural that you’d want to be here with someone you’ve never met before.”

  “It seemed natural to me,” she said.

  Awkwardly he patted her arm. “I can’t see how. Let me give you some advice anyway.”

  “Okay.”

  “Don’t shut yourself off. Now, that doesn’t mean I want to see you chasing after Alex Palermo. He isn’t right for you. But I wouldn’t want you to be anything like me. After your grandmother left, I decided there wasn’t much about me that anyone else would want. Oh, I quit drinking, because I thought she might come back someday. But she didn’t. And after some years went by I decided I was just meant to be alone. But being alone, it can be lonely.”

  Sage advice from a man who had lived with much regret. She stood on tiptoe to kiss his weathered cheek. “Thank you.”

  “Go on now. Don’t thank me. I still don’t want you here, underfoot and bringing barn cats in my house.”

  “Of course you don’t. If you’ll watch the kitten, I’ll see if I can get us some help to find your cow and calf.”

  “That would be good. I need to take a few head to auction next week.” He picked up the kitten. “Take it back to the barn. Not enough room in here for Bub and a cat.”

  She took the kitten.

  “I’ll go get Alex.”

  She was heading for the door when he stopped her. “How’d you learn to drive that truck?”

  “Looked it up on the internet,” she answered. She left smiling, because she heard him chuckling and saying something about her backbone.

  * * *

  The bull in the chute bucked, kicking at the metal enclosure, and then rattled the gate with his horns. Alex grabbed the horns and brought the bull’s head back around. The teenager standing on the catwalk backed up a bit, his eyes widening as he watched the animal try to come out of the chute.

  “Second thoughts?” Alex asked.

  “No, of course not.”

  Alex laughed. The other boys leaned against the arena wall and looked as if they were about to run for their mamas. They were neighbor kids who wanted to bull ride and their parents had given permission for them to buck bulls with Alex. His bulls needed the experience. The boys needed experience and instruction. It was a win-win situation.

  Unfortunately the boys also needed courage, which they hadn’t gotten on steers that were used in the earlier stages of bull-riding training.

  “Okay, I’m going to ride this bull and show you all how it’s done. And then we’ll try again on Hazardous Duty.” As if he heard his name, the bull pushed against the metal of the pen.

  He motioned the boys close. “Come on over and help me out. Jason, you get down there and be ready to open the gate. Dusty and Kyle, stand here with me and help me get settled.”

  The last thing he would admit to these boys was that he had no desire to get on the back of a bull. Not now. Not ever. Especially not in this arena. But if he was going to let these kids do it, he had to be willing to pull his rope on one of the rankest of the six bulls he owned.

  For now. He didn’t want to let go of this dream, to own bucking bulls. But every now and then he wondered why it was his dream.

  He pushed his hat down tight and climbed over the side of the chute to settle on the back of the bull. The minute he got his seat, the bull started to shift and buck, trying to unseat him. He wished the eight seconds could start inside the gate because sometimes this was the toughest part, and could even be the most dangerous. He’d seen men broken and knocked out just trying to get their bull rope tied.

  He pounded the resin-covered rope over his gloved hand. The bull went up but Dusty pushed him down and Kyle held Alex’s shoulders. He heard a truck and he groaned. That sounded like Dan’s truck. He hadn’t seen Marissa since he helped her get Dan home the previous day. “Ready, Alex? He’s just going to get more rowdy,” Jason called from the dirt floor of the arena.

  “Ready.” He nodded once. The gate flew open.

  He breathed past the first jolt and the left-hand turn he knew was coming. He blinked away the image of his father’s prone figure on the arena floor. The bull bucked right twice and then he took a flying leap and belly rolled. As Alex flew through the air he caught a glimpse of a woman with short dark hair and heard her scream.

  He hit the ground, rolled, covered his head with his arms and then felt the bull slam against him. White-hot pain slashed through his leg and his side. The bull came at him again.

  He caught his breath and scrambled to get on his feet. Someone was there, distracting the bull. Jason. The kid grabbed at the bull and then ran for the gate. Dusty had the gate open for the bull.

  Alex leaned forward, winded. When he straightened, Marissa was there. She looked small in Dan’s straw hat and denim jacket.

  He swiped at his face to clear his vision. “I lost my hat. And you should not be in this arena.”

  “Your hat? You’re worried about losing a hat when you might have lost your life?” she yelled at him.

  “I wouldn’t lose my life.” He took a cautious step forward and bit back a groan.

  “Who would help me if you weren’t here?”

  He managed to chuckle. “People. There are plenty of people who can help you.”

  “I like you.” She helped him walk out of the arena. “So I would be very offended if you got yourself killed by a bull.”

  He pulled free from her arms, and he admitted it took some doing. Not because he couldn’t walk on his own, but because he liked being in her arms. They were slim but strong. They felt like a safe haven. He couldn’t say that he’d ever felt that before.

  And it frightened him more than being on the back of that bull. Because a safe haven was a place where a person took refuge. She couldn’t be his. Ever.

  But her words were ricocheting ar
ound in his brain. He could have been killed by that bull. She wasn’t far off the mark.

  “My dad died in that arena,” he said softly, then moved ahead of her. She came after him. Though admittedly she didn’t have to move too fast. He collapsed on the closest bench and put his head between his hands. She sat down next to him. Her shoulder brushed against his.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered. She sat close to his side, her presence undoing something inside him. Something he’d kept boxed up and off-limits for years.

  It might have been the hit to his head, but he was having a hard time understanding how she had managed, in such a short amount of time, to make him think things he’d never thought and feel things he’d never felt.

  “Don’t worry about,” he replied.

  “It has to be difficult, being here, knowing that you lost him here.”

  The truth happened to be pretty ugly and he didn’t want to see the reaction on her face when he told her. But maybe if she knew the truth, she’d walk away from him and he wouldn’t have to keep fighting his feelings for her every time they got close.

  * * *

  “I wanted him to die. I was a kid, just seventeen, and more than once I’d thought how much better life would be if he...”

  “You were just a kid,” she said, moving closer.

  “Yes, a kid. And he was as mean as a snake. My sister has her own stories. We all do. But that’s not why you’re here.”

  “I’m sorry.” Her hand settled on his cheek. He briefly closed his eyes and her hand slipped away.

  “Childhood shouldn’t be so difficult.” She said it in a way that made him think she had experience with troubled childhoods. It made him want to ask questions of his own.

  As if she knew what he was thinking, she walked away from him.

  He swiped at his face and saw blood on his hand. He needed to clean himself up and get back to work. As he stood, he saw Marissa at the entrance to the arena talking to Jason, Dusty and Kyle. The three teenagers were listening intently, as if she was somehow in charge. He headed their way but they didn’t wait. Jason did give him a salute as he turned and left.

  “They’re leaving but they put the bulls back in their pen first,” Marissa said as she returned to his side.